It's a sad feeling...
seeing my christmas tree. with nothing underneath it. it's not like I am craving christmas presents or getting stuff. i am just sad that there is nothing from me under that tree that has John's name on it. or anyone's name on it. it's just a tree skirt. i bought it 2 years ago and saved it for when we would have our own place.
now it's just at my place. under a fake lame 6 foot tree.
i may have decorated the house but I can't convince myself to get in the spirit. when i go to a store and they say happy holidays I want to yell at them.
i have only 18 more days until christmas... and 20 days until my birthday. so hard to celebrate without the one that made it worth celebrating.
damn it.
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