Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Memory Boxes

When me and John started getting serious in our relationship I decided it was time to start a "memory box" to place all the many memories we would have somewhere... and not forget. To be able to look back on them. We occasionally did. Not often.
After John's death I had to buy a new box. A larger box to hold on to all his sentimental things. I bought it a week after he died. It is black. It looks like a box you wouldn't want to open. Our other box has palm trees on it. Way much happier box.
The boxes sit in my closet. I have 3. One is from our earlier relationship, one is from our Europe trip, and one is was made after his death. Sometimes, when I feel the need to grieve, I will take out a box and place it on my bed. I open it and slowly take out items one at a time. I grieve over each item individually. Some items, like his glasses, I touch and smell... to try and feel closer to him. I had him wear his glasses at the viewing... and took them back after everyone left. I was the last person to say goodbye to him there. I was in the parlor alone and I kissed his cold cheek... and gently slid the glasses off his face. They will be mine to keep forever. I was the one who pleaded for him to get them. And sadly it wasn't just because he needed them... i just thought he looked so cute in them that he had to have a pair!! Of course, we got these really sleek looking Oakleys. When he put them on it was like he turned into a different person. "professional John" I loved it.
I am sure many people at the viewing didn't know John with glasses.
I am sure it was weird to see him with them on.
But, it's how I wanted to remember him. My handsome John.
The box holds much more than glasses..... let me share...

The newest memory box... purchased right after John's death. To hold our memories.

A smaller memory box inside. Bought by my school after John died.
John's silver DCI medal. The year Phantom won drums.
John's glasses. I took them after the viewing... he always looked so handsome in them.

John wrote me this note before he left for work on Valentine's Day. The night before we stayed up really late making over 200 valentine cookies for my students. It was quite a project. But we enjoyed it!!!

The staff at Waldorf signed this Congratulations card the day after John proposed to me.
John gave me this Valentine's day card about two years before he actually proposed to me. He knew from the start he wanted to marry me. :)

John's cards were my favorite.

John only bought me Hallmark cards. I don't know why. He considered them more classy? One time he didn't... and he did this. I laughed a lot. He was the funniest.

Read this. It breaks my heart but reminds me how amazingly lucky I was. The last sentence is what gets me.
John's tie bars. I bought him the top one from Tiffanys last Christmas.

John worked with me at Universal for a whole month. He hated it. He worked at Spiderman... it was hilarious. It was nice getting off together and talking about how our days went. My favorite story was when he danced for MC Hammer... hahahahahaha
John's Phantom Regiment dog tags.
John's mom bought us this picture frame the day he died. Just the beginning.... of the end....

Evan and I went to a bridal show. Being engaged was so enchanting... and I only got to experience it for 17 days.

Those are just a few of the memories in the box.... in one box. There isn't a box large enough in the world to hold all the moments we shared together.


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